Straight-talking, no bull sh*it parenting

advice that cuts the fluff and gets real.

How to Survive Your First Baby Without Losing Your Mind, Relationship, or All Your MoneY

The straight talking guide for busy parents that cuts through the noise and tells you exactly what you do and don’t need to know.

Instant PDF download. No waiting.

Start cutting through the parenting BS immediately

"All expenses paid"

STRAIGHT TALKING, NO-FLUFF...

the no bull sh*t guide to your first baby

The Brutally First Baby Parenting Guide is your zero-fluff strategy to prep you for your first year of parenthood—packed with practical shortcuts, light humour, and parenting hacks that actually work.


Created by Harper Sawyer—a busy entrepreneur and parenting realist who’s helping countless first-time parents ditch overwhelm and regain their sanity—this blunt guide is easy to digest and deploy, delivering fast, sanity-saving results.


Your family life will thrive as you prepare to handle late-night dramas, endless nappies, and ridiculous advice like a parenting boss, while your friends wonder how you make parenting look easy (hint: ruthless honesty and shameless practicality).

LET’S BE REALLY HONEST…

PARENTING IS TOUGH ENOUGH WITHOUT ALL THE FLUFFY NONSENSE SO LET ME GIVE YOU THE INSIDE SCOOP

Instant PDF download. No waiting.

Start cutting through the parenting BS immediately.

What’s included (Clear & Simple):

• The REAL essentials-only newborn checklist (nope, your baby doesn’t need designer shoes).


• Practical prep for your home (spoiler: Instagram-perfect nurseries are totally overrated).


• The actual truth about childbirth and recovery—honest and unfiltered.


• Real talk on breastfeeding, bottle-feeding, and all the judgement that comes with it.


• Surviving newborn sleep (or lack thereof) with your sanity intact.


• Handling unwanted advice (politely, but firmly)


• Things nobody warned you about (hello projectile poops and unsolicited visits!).

Who’s This For (And Who It’s Definitely Not For):


• Perfect if you’re a busy, practical millennial parent-to-be who appreciates straight talk and humour.


• Not for those seeking sugar-coated advice or fluffy parenting clichés.

Why This Guide? (The Brutal Truth):


• Because your time and energy are too precious to waste on outdated or impractical advice.


• Because parenting is messy, exhausting, and hard—and pretending otherwise helps no one.


• Because you deserve straightforward, evidence-backed guidance (and a good laugh).

The brutally honest

parenting guide

  • Zero fluff essentials checklist (because designer baby shoes won’t stop them crying at 3 AM)

  • The actual realities of childbirth and recovery (brace yourself—it ain’t pretty, honey)

  • Honest feeding advice (breast or bottle—zero judgment).

  • Realistic sleep survival tactics (spoiler: sleep is rare, coffee is not).

  • Boundaries and sanity-saving scripts for unsolicited parenting advice.

  • The messy, hilarious truths nobody warned you about (projectile poops, anyone?

THE NO BULL SH*T GUIDE TO

YOUR FIRST BABY

ONLY $9.99 - Less than two overpriced coffees (which you’ll desperately need anyway)

Instant PDF download. No waiting.

Start cutting through the parenting BS immediately

MESSAGE FROM THE AUTHOR…

Hey, I’m Harper—a busy millennial mum and entrepreneur who was fed up with reading endless, fluffy parenting advice that wasted my precious time (and money!). When I was pregnant, I desperately wished someone had handed me one straightforward guide that didn’t sugarcoat the realities of becoming a parent.


So, I created one.

This guide gives you blunt truths, practical checklists, and zero fluff—exactly what you need to navigate pregnancy and early parenthood without losing your sanity (or your savings).

What’s inside the guide…

Real talk: Parenting isn’t always cuddles and cute selfies—it’s also 2 AM negotiations and figuring out who changes the next explosive nappy. This guide makes having those awkward-but-essential conversations easy, so you can align your expectations, avoid resentment, and tackle parenthood as the ultimate team.

Forget designer baby clothes—your baby genuinely doesn’t care.

This guide will not only help you to shop smart, but cut through the marketing BS, and buy only what you actually need (so you can save your cash for the much needed coffee and sanity-saving takeaways when cooking is the last thing on your mind.)

Grandparents mean well, but parenting advice has changed—a lot—since their day. This guide equips you with polite-yet-firm ways to set boundaries, filter outdated tips, and navigate unsolicited advice without offending your in-laws (or losing your mind). I’ve included some actual phrases for you to practice and use when you need.

Pinterest-perfect nurseries look great online—but they’re totally unrealistic (and overpriced). This guide helps you ditch the pressure to create Instagram-worthy spaces, offering practical tips to set up a functional, stress-free home that’ll actually support your real-life parenting journey.

Breast or bottle? Honestly, your baby just needs feeding—not judgment. This guide cuts through the guilt and confusion, giving you straightforward advice on all feeding options, so you can confidently choose what’s best for you (and tell everyone else to politely mind their own business).

Breathe easy— with this guide you will officially be able to ditch the overwhelm. With all the fluff and circulating out there, this guide will provide you with brutally honest advice that actually works. You to will be able to sit back, relax, and feel smug knowing you’ve cracked the parenting code.

Here's exactly how it works…

  • Download the guide instantly

  • Read through it at your convenience

  • Implement and take action on the advice

  • Feel more relaxed and confident about becoming a new parent

$19.99 $9.99

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Instant PDF download. No waiting.

Start cutting through the parenting BS immediately.

ADDITIONAL BONUS PACKS INCLUDED…

Join the parents Who Went From overwhelm to CALM AND CONFIDENT

“Honestly, this guide was an absolute lifesaver for us! As first-time parents, we were drowning in conflicting advice from friends, family, and even strangers at the supermarket. The clear, practical tips and hilarious real-talk helped us feel instantly calmer and more prepared. But our absolute favourite part was the genius phrases provided for handling unsolicited parenting advice.

Thanks to this guide, we confidently set boundaries without offending anyone—phrases like, ‘I appreciate you want to help, but we’re going to try the current guidelines first’ and ‘ Appreciate that… I’ll happily trade tips for a nap and hot coffee instead’ were pure gold. Seriously, every new parent needs this guide. We’re recommending it to all our expecting friends!”


– Alex & Chloe W.

FREQUENTLY ASKED QUESTIONS

For Those who may still have questions

How will I receive the guide?

Instant digital PDF download—read it immediately on any device.

Can I gift this guide?

Absolutely—just forward the download email to the lucky new parent.

Is this guide for dads too?

100%. Parenting is teamwork—this guide keeps it real for everyone

What if I don’t find it useful?

We’re confident you will, but if it’s genuinely not for you, reach out—your satisfaction matters.

TESTIMONIALS

WHAT OTHER PARENTS ARE SAYING

“Honestly, this is the only guide I actually read cover-to-cover.”

– Charlotte T.

“Realistic, funny, and seriously sanity-saving.”

– Mia S

“Every first-time parent NEEDS this!”

– Leah H.

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